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| The letters "B L O G" except the O is a globe. Image source. |
Top 7 posts (by pageviews):
1. Asexual "For me, it felt like 'oh, okay, that's what sex is. Well now that we've done it once and found out what it's like, we don't really need to do it again.'"
2. There's Something Missing From This Article About Marriage And Sex "And unless you can state outright that rushing into marriage IS WORSE than having premarital sex, you have no business telling people 'oh you shouldn't get married just so you can have sex.'"
3. I knew Desiring God ideology is spiritual abuse, but wow. "It's incredibly harmful to describe symptoms of depression and then call it a spiritual problem which can only be fixed by having the correct view of God. I plan to never stop talking about this."
4. For This Asexual, Purity Culture Was All About Fear "I wish I had been allowed to actually explore my own desires and find their limits. Instead, I lived in fear of desires that didn't even exist."
5. Tickling, Consent, and The Way It Works "It’s not a big deal that they purposely did something to me that I literally JUST SAID I did not want. My boundary was not reasonable, says society, so they didn’t have to respect it. That’s The Way It Works."
6. Christianity and "Selfishness": Here are the Receipts "The Christianity I used to believe was an anti-human ideology which equated godliness with a suppression of ourselves, our emotions, our individuality."
7. "Is it Okay for Christians to Use Sex Toys?" (An Exercise in Missing the Point) "Why don't we just teach people what a healthy relationship is, and teach people that their desires matter and their emotions matter and they should do what they need to do to take care of those desires and emotions? Why all this fretting about 'oh no, the bible doesn't say anything about sex toys, how will we ever know if we're allowed to use them or not?'"
A post I did for Libby Anne's blog:
I’m Really Really REALLY Glad I Had Sex Before Marriage "I can’t imagine how terrible it would have been for me to 'wait for marriage.' (For other people, it may be the right decision, but not for me.) To live in that fear and shame and depression for another two years, only to find out that sex isn’t that much of a big deal and there was nothing to be afraid of all along."
A few other posts I'm really proud of, even though they didn't get the most pageviews:
1. Runaway Radical: Radical Christian Missions "The point is to sacrifice so much that you're constantly in a state of crisis and you have to 'depend on God'- because some people in this world don't have clean water, so what makes you think you deserve to feel secure about getting all your needs met?"
2. The things I've never let myself say about worship "I raised my hands and yelled and danced, and I wasn't allowed to have feelings about the fact that a whole bunch of people at church could see me."
3. How Are Autistics Supposed To Know Which of Our Pain is Socially Acceptable To Express? "How am I supposed to know that, even though they expected me to go the whole damn day with my sock scratching me and I'm supposed to pretend I'm fine, now they're going to think something is wrong with me if I don't whine while getting blood drawn with a needle?"
4. You know that whole "white dress means virginity"? Yeah, not actually a real thing. "If you grow up in purity culture, it doesn't seem too far-fetched to imagine that a salesperson at a wedding dress store might ask about your virginity. But no, they did not. Of course they did not."
5. I Can't Write Wedding Vows Without Thinking About Divorce "But am I weird for thinking that way? It's certainly not part of the cultural narrative around weddings- apparently, the couple is supposed to be so high on their love for each other that they effortlessly make bold promises of eternal love as if it's no big deal, and divorce never even crosses their mind."
6. They Prayed About It (a post about the #NashvilleStatement) "Even the thought of taking a quiet moment to pray and ask for God's direction is triggering for me. Because of what he did. Because of how he took advantage of me."
Looking forward to another good year of blogging~ I have LOTS of good posts planned. :)
And here's a question for my readers: What topics do you want me to blog about more?
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edit: nooooooooo I just realized there are 14 posts here even though the title says 15, and as a math nerd I feel quite embarrassed about that. It's because earlier drafts had different numbers of links and I guess I didn't update the final count.
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