Thursday, September 19, 2024

Don't Protect God

Image text: "If anyone says, 'I love God,' but hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. - 1 John 4:20" Image source.

Last week I published this post, The Second-Worst Bible Story, which is about Numbers 25. I have one more thing to say about this story:

This bible story demonstrates how dangerous it is when people believe they need to protect God. 

If you believe the bible is true, you will come away from this story with the message that sometimes it's right to do violence on people who are minding their own business in a way your God considers "sinful." I do not believe the bible is true. And I believe this message is very harmful. So my message is this: Don't protect God.

In Numbers 25, Israelite men have relationships with Moabite and Midianite women (I always assumed this meant casual sex; Wilda Gafney, author of "Womanist Midrash" says it means all kinds of relationships, including cross-cultural marriage). In response, God tells Moses that those who are involved in this must be executed. And then Phinehas the priest takes his spear and follows a couple into their tent and stabs them to death.

The Lord said to Moses, “Phinehas son of Eleazar, the son of Aaron, the priest, has turned my anger away from the Israelites. Since he was as zealous for my honor among them as I am, I did not put an end to them in my zeal. Therefore tell him I am making my covenant of peace with him. He and his descendants will have a covenant of a lasting priesthood, because he was zealous for the honor of his God and made atonement for the Israelites.”

God is saying that Phinehas's actions were right because Phinehas was protecting God's "honor." Back when I was evangelical, I believed that people's sin hurts God, and if we really love God, we will want to stop people from sinning, in order to help God feel better.

That's how this story earned its spot as The Second-Worst Bible Story. The idea that we should protect God.

This idea of "if we truly love God and don't want him to be hurt, we should burst into other people's lives and force them to stop sinning by any means necessary, even violence" is definitely NOT a normal evangelical belief. Probably most evangelicals would be horrified by it. And yet, Numbers 25 makes a case for it. 

And the seeds of it are definitely present, in evangelical ideology.

Yeah, here's what I was taught about sin: God loves all people so much, and desperately wants to have a personal relationship with each person. He's just so broken-hearted at all the people who don't believe in him, or don't follow his rules. He's very sad. He created the world, so everyone *should* obey him, but they don't. And, every sin is an infinite offense against a holy God. God is so perfect, and therefore every little sin hurts him so bad.

Usually, we didn't talk about this idea that "God is constantly so heartbroken about all the people not doing what he says," but it was there, in the background, when we talked about how much God loves everyone, personally, loves them SO MUCH, and how people *should* submit their lives to God and have a personal relationship with God, and how wrong it is that most people don't. 

See how Numbers 25 says that this couple (Zimri and Kozbi) needed to die because of their sin- that from God's perspective, their sin of having a forbidden relationship was so bad that it completely overshadowed anything else about them. It was the only thing that mattered to God, apparently. He couldn't see them as people. The most important thing was that the sin needed to be stopped, and the easiest way to do that was to just kill them. That's the fastest way to help God feel better. In some sense, it was "right" to kill them; it was "right" that they should die, because if they lived, they would continue to hurt God with their sin. Usually, though, God lets people live, and they continue to sin and hurt him, and it hurts him so bad- but because of his great love, he's willing to be hurt like that. It's not fair to him, but he allows it because he loves people so much. (I was taught that this is what "mercy" means.)

That is what evangelicals teach about sin. Every person sins sometimes, and is therefore so incredibly disgusting to God that God can't even bear to look at them. God should just send all of us to hell. God can't pay attention to anything about who you are as a person. Fortunately, Jesus comes and covers our sin, if we believe in him. Then God can tolerate us.

(I submit to you that this is not "good news"; this is not the gospel.)

When I left evangelicalism, and I began to believe "people are good", that was a such a huge change for me. Seems like such a simple, obvious thing- "people are good"- but as an evangelical I very explicitly did NOT believe that.

Anyway, don't protect God. Don't hurt people in the name of faithfulness to God. 

Jesus said the greatest commandment is "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind." And, he said, "the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’" I do not read these as 2 separate commandments (though when I was evangelical, of course I did). We love God by loving people. I do not read this as, "We should love God first, and people second- and if they're ever in conflict, God takes priority." No. If they're ever in conflict, you're doing something wrong. The apostle John said, "Whoever does not love their brother or sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen." 

Jesus said "the second is like it" and I believe that.

The place where this idea of "protecting God" would come up in real life is, typically, as it relates to other people's sex lives. Other people just minding their own business and not hurting anyone, but *you* believe that they are hurting God by having unmarried sex/ being queer/ etc. (And, in this ideology, it's not true that people are "just minding their own business"- in this ideology, everything belongs to God, everyone's sex life belongs to God, and it's not okay for people to make their own choices.)

You can use this kind of belief to justify anything. If you believe that some behavior is "sinful" even though there's no actual real-world evidence that it's harmful- you believe it's sinful just because "God said", and no real-world reason is necessary- well, what's to stop you from claiming that about anything at all? "We need to stop people from doing xyz because it's a sin" - xyz can be anything. And yes, when I was evangelical, I did believe that there were things God commands us to do or not do which our limited human minds can't make any sense of, but we need to obey anyway. This kind of thinking is so dangerous; it can justify literally anything at all. It justified Phinehas's murder of Zimri and Kozbi.

So don't separate "loving God" and "loving your neighbor." Loving God is loving your neighbor.

Somewhat related to this is Christians claiming that God caused hurricanes or whatever as punishment for the US giving rights to gay people. You have to wonder, do they agree with God on this? Or are they saying it's awful that we need to submit to the violent whims of this God, we have to hate the people that he hates, or else we'll be next... In that case, it's not about policing other people's behavior because we love God so much and don't want him to be hurt by their sin; it's about policing other people's behavior because we fear that when God punishes them, the punishment will come on us too.

Okay, I know that evangelicals would argue with what I'm saying here, and say "hey that's not what we believe." I mean, they believe everyone is a sinner who deserves to go to hell, but some of these other things, they would disagree with. Like the idea that we should try to force people to stop sinning. Or that God sends hurricanes as punishment for a society's acceptance of gay people. Okay, I'll give them the second one- when I was evangelical, I regarded Pat Robertson as a crackpot and definitely wouldn't want to be lumped in with him.

For the first one- the idea that if we really love God, we should try to forcibly stop other people from "sinning" because their sin hurts God: Yeah, most evangelicals would recognize this idea as horrifying, and argue against it by saying "it's not our role to invade people's personal lives and stop them from sinning- our role is just to love people" or "even if we try to force people to stop sinning, it won't work because sin is in the heart- they still *want* to sin, and that also hurts God."

Sure, yeah, those are great arguments. But then, what do you do with Numbers 25? If you believe the bible is the authority over our lives, then you have to believe that Numbers 25 teaches there do exist some circumstances (rare as they may be) where we should butt into people's personal lives, even though they are not hurting anyone, and stop them from "sinning"- and maybe even go as far as murdering them, if that's what it takes.

I mean, that's horrifying, but what else can you say about Numbers 25, if you believe the bible? That's why this is The Second-Worst Bible Story. (If you're wondering which is the worst, it's 2 Samuel 21.)

So don't protect God from "sinners." Don't love God in opposition to loving people. Numbers 25 got it wrong.

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Related:

The Second-Worst Bible Story

The Worst Bible Story

Dr. Strange's Ways Are Higher Than Our Ways 

God of Bad Snaps 

I knew Desiring God ideology is spiritual abuse, but wow.

Monday, September 16, 2024

Blogaround + Happy Mid-Autumn Festival!

A tree that has fallen down on a road because of the typhoon. Image source.

Happy Mid-Autumn Festival! 中秋节快乐!

Here in Shanghai, we just had a typhoon, so we couldn't really do much for the holiday. (Typhoon Bebinca. Chinese name is 贝碧嘉.) Sixth Tone has an article on that: Typhoon Bebinca Slams Shanghai, Strongest Storm Since 1949. I was surprised to read it was the most powerful typhoon since 1949. In the area where I live, we had very strong winds and heavy rain for most of the day yesterday. Definitely bad enough that no one should go outside. I saw some large tree branches that had blown off the trees. But no flooding or power outages. It felt like an average typhoon to me, not "the worst typhoon since 1949." I guess it was worse in other parts of Shanghai.

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If you are a US citizen living abroad, you need to use the FPCA (Federal Post Card Application) to register to vote. VoteFromAbroad.org walks you through how to do that. 

If you have registered, then Ballot Drop Day is September 21. Check your email, fill out your ballot, and send it in!

If you live in a state that requires you to mail in your ballot, US consulates are able to mail them for you. Here are the deadlines to bring your ballot to one of the US consulates in China so it gets mailed on time:

Beijing: Friday, September 27
Guangzhou: Friday, September 27
Shanghai: Wednesday, September 25
Shenyang: Friday, September 27
Wuhan: Friday, September 27

If you miss the deadline, and you live in a state that requires you to send your ballot by mail (some states allow email or fax) then you should mail it yourself.

VOTE VOTE VOTE!

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1. Study: You Should Watch this Video to the End (September 9) "So for Study 5, they gave a new group of students the ability to go on YouTube and pick any video they want and watch it for ten minutes without interruption. After another unrelated task, the students were allowed to skip around YouTube all they wanted for ten minutes. And yep, once again, the students reported being more bored in the switching condition."

2. Taylor Swift endorses Kamala Harris for president (September 11) Yessssss.

3. HRC and the Fight for Gender Justice. (September 10) A post from Crip Dyke about the Human Rights Campaign (HRC). Hey, anybody remember that trend 10-15 years ago when everybody was changing their Facebook profile picture to the yellow and blue equals sign that was the HRC logo? And then there was a second trend when people changed their Facebook profile picture to a red and pink equals sign because, I can't remember why? I think because people decided the yellow and blue one was problematic in some way?

That was right around the time I changed from opposing marriage equality to supporting it. I remember feeling like it was a bit odd that they called themselves the "Human Rights Campaign" but they were basically *only* about marriage equality for same-sex marriages. Seems like "human rights" should include way more things than that?

Anyway this is a good post from Crip Dyke, from a trans perspective, about what kinds of issues HRC prioritizes, and the strategies they use, and where that fits into the queer community overall.

4. School Lunch: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO) (September 12) 26-minute video.

5. Ace in the Gyno Space (September 12) "The thing that none of these people said (because they couldn’t have, because they weren’t like me, because they couldn’t have known) was how being an asexual at the gynecologist would be."

Sunday, September 15, 2024

I Can't Get Over These "Mass Deportation Now" Signs

People in a crowd holding up signs that say "Mass Deportation Now!" Image source.

[content note: anti-immigrant hate]

At the Republican National Convention in July, the Trump campaign handed out these "Mass Deportation Now" signs to the crowd. I went on Google Images and searched, and there are lots of photos of cheering crowd members holding up these signs.

And I just ... how? How can people cheer for "mass deportation"? Do they know what "deportation" means? It means you have to uproot your whole life and move to a different country. How can people wish that on anyone?

(How will I explain this to my children?)

I just ... I mean, I could say "this is a big deal to me because I'm an immigrant" (I'm American and I live in China) but, come on, you don't have to be an immigrant to understand that being deported would really screw up someone's life.

I just can't understand how people could be so heartless. It's hard to even look at these images of the crowds holding these signs.

Well... obviously the answer is that these are people who support Trump, and not only that, they support him so much that they actually came and attended the Republican National Convention. So I shouldn't be surprised that they really hate immigrants.

Anyway, I guess I don't really have anything else to say- if you don't understand how cruel "mass deportation" is, I don't think there's anything I can say that can make a difference.

Here, I'll just paste something I wrote in my May 22 blogaround:

I am an immigrant- I am American and I've lived in China for 10 years. Back when I was thinking about moving to China, I totally believed that I could just move to whatever country I wanted to. My whole life, I had heard about American missionaries moving to so many different countries around the world (and my decision to move to China was very much influenced by Christian missions ideology), and about Americans going on vacation to beautiful and interesting places all around the world. 

And at some point- I think after I moved to China- I found out that many people, because of where they were born, can't just go galivanting around to whatever country they want. *I* can, because I'm American, but many citizens of other countries can't. That was shocking to me. Everyone should be allowed to live wherever they want!

That's what radicalized me. Support all immigrants- legal immigrants, undocumented immigrants, refugees, third-culture kids, etc etc etc. Support all immigrants.

Anyway, vote. Vote all these Republicans out.


Tuesday, September 10, 2024

Blogaround

1. Taobao Plans to (Finally) Allow Users to Pay Via WeChat Pay (September 5) Well I guess this is only relevant to people who do a lot of online shopping in China, but it's going to make *my* life more convenient so I'm posting it here.

2. A Defense of Delilah (March 4) "The only difference between Delilah's actions and those of the women we laud is that she wasn't playing for the team the Bible roots for."

3. "criticizing AI is racism," says AI-backed writers group 😐 (September 5, via) 24-minute video from D'Angelo about the drama with NaNoWriMo and AI.

4. The Chosen Doubles Down (August 18) Laura Robinson continues to write about this bible-related urban legend about anointing the Passover lamb, and I am so here for it.

Also from Laura Robinson: The Ethical Problems with the Something Was Wrong Podcast (September 3) This is a really good analysis of the ideas "don't blame the victim" and "believe victims" which you always hear feminists saying. What does it actually mean to "believe victims" and how should that look different depending on what your role is? Particularly interesting is how the statistics about "false rape allegations are extremely rare" are specifically about rapes that are reported to the police. In that context, false allegations are extremely rare because there is little incentive for people to lie. But in other situations, it might not be so unlikely that someone claims to be a victim of rape when they are actually not.

5. This Sudoku Is Astonishing [MUST WATCH] (September 7) 22 minutes in, not one single digit placed, "This is the sort of thing that should be, just, taught in schools as an example of what human beings are capable of." (59-minute sudoku solve video.)

6. The Bell Riots: What Should Happen When History Catches Up to Star Trek? (September 2) 16-minute video. "Some of you might say, but wait, doesn’t Star Trek need to resolve these inconsistencies between its fictional history and our real history in some explicit, in-story way, so that creators of future Star Trek projects can refer to those fictional historical events without contradicting real history? Good question. No."

7. Dick Cheney says he will vote for Harris (September 7)

8. James Earl Jones, voice of Darth Vader, dies aged 93 (September 10) I was a huge fan of "The Lion King" when I was little. (Okay who am I kidding, I am still a huge fan of "The Lion King.") I remember one time, my parents were watching "Star Wars", and they explained it to me by saying "that guy is the same voice as Mufasa."

9. The Word of the Week: Sanewashing (September 9) "Why isn’t Trump being covered the same way? When Trump says something insane or incoherent that should be the news. It’s not just smoke that a reporter needs to blow away to reveal some underlying policy point that may or may not actually exist."

10. cohost is shutting down (September 10) Cohost is a social media site. The link I'm sharing here is a Pillowfort post discussing it, because I've only heard about Cohost through Pillowfort. Sad to hear they're shutting down.

Monday, September 9, 2024

The Second-Worst Bible Story

Ancient Jewish wedding. Image source.

In 2015, I wrote a post called The Worst Bible Story, which also included my pick for the second-worst bible story, Numbers 25. Right now I'm reading Wilda Gafney's book "Womanist Midrash," which has a section discussing Numbers 25. So let's talk about it.

The book discusses these 3 women or groups of women in connection with this story:

  1. Women of Moab (Numbers 25)
  2. Cozbi, daughter of Tzur (Numbers 25)
  3. Women of Midian (Numbers 25 and 31)

Here's what Gafney says in the book, and my thoughts on it:

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Lumping together Moab and Midian

Numbers 25:1-2 says the Israelites committed "sexual immorality" with Moabite women, and also participated in the worship of the Moabite gods. ("Sexual immorality" is how the NIV translates it; Gafney does her own translations and puts it as "unsanctioned-intimate-relationships." She says this word can mean prostitution or promiscuity or worshiping other gods.) God and Moses order the Israelites involved to be executed.

Then, Cozbi (also translated as Kozbi), a Midianite women, is publicly killed by Phinehas the priest. And then Moses leads the Israelites into battle to get "vengeance" on the Midianites.

So, Gafney points out, wait a minute. The Moabites were the ones who "seduced" the Israelites, so why are we suddenly talking about Midianites? Why are the Israelites fighting the Midianites in retaliation for this? Gafney says (page 143):

The Moabite women, their God, and the Israelite women and men who joined their community sharing kinship ties and worship have been forgotten. This Midianite woman and her people become the focus of the saga. The Moabites and Midianites are interchangeable; they are all foreigners-- never mind that Israel is migrating through inhabited lands to a settled one, uninvited.

Years and years ago, when I was evangelical and spent my time arguing with atheists over whether the bible has contradictions, I would have reacted to someone pointing out this Moab/Midian issue like this: well, whatever, they were probably the same, right? Why do you want so badly to discredit the bible that you fixate on these little details?

And if I were reading the bible by myself, back then, I wouldn't have even noticed this switch from talking about Moab to talking about Midian. I read with an apologetics mindset, fully believing that there are no errors in the bible, and therefore with blinders on, subconsciously smoothing things over and filling in gaps so I wouldn't notice any errors. Moab and Midian, they're basically the same, right?

For me as a white Christian, this kind of thing would be simply be a philosophical argument over whether the bible is inerrant or not. But people of color have the experience of being lumped in together, even being victims of "mistargeted" racism. For example, someone hates Japan, so they bully a Chinese-American person, as if that's the same thing.

(I mean, all racism is like that though. Taking one bad example and believing it is true of a whole race. It's not like regular racism makes more sense than "mistargeted" racism.)

To believe in inerrancy, you have to racist-ly lump together the Moabites and Midianites, as if they're the same. So of course that's what I did, back then. As a white person you can just do that. But for people of color it's not so simple, because they themselves have been victims of that exact kind of racism.

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The wedding of Cozbi and Zimri

I was shocked that Gafney reads this part as a wedding. Here's how the NIV version of the bible puts it:

[content note for graphic violence]

Then an Israelite man brought into the camp a Midianite woman right before the eyes of Moses and the whole assembly of Israel while they were weeping at the entrance to the tent of meeting. When Phinehas son of Eleazar, the son of Aaron, the priest, saw this, he left the assembly, took a spear in his hand and followed the Israelite into the tent. He drove the spear into both of them, right through the Israelite man and into the woman’s stomach. Then the plague against the Israelites was stopped ...

The name of the Israelite who was killed with the Midianite woman was Zimri son of Salu, the leader of a Simeonite family. And the name of the Midianite woman who was put to death was Kozbi daughter of Zur, a tribal chief of a Midianite family.

Here's Gafney's translation of the same passage:

Suddenly, a man from the women and men of Israel came and brought a Midianite woman to his kinfolk, in the sight of Moshe (Moses) and in the sight of the whole congregation of the women and men of Israel, and they were weeping at the entrance of the tent of meeting! Then Pinchas (Phinehas) ben El'azar (Eleazar) ben Aharon (Aaron) the priest saw; he rose from the midst of the congregation and took a spear in his hand. He went after the Israelite man into the tent-chamber, and he stabbed the two of them, the Israelite man and the woman, through her inner-chamber, and the plague was stopped among the people of Israel... The name of the slain Israelite man who was killed with the Midianite woman was Zimri ben Salu, leader of an ancestral house belonging to the Simeonites. The name of the Midianite woman who was killed was Cozbi bat Tzur; Tzur was the head of peoples, of an ancestral house in Midian.

Gafney describes this as a wedding where the 2 newlyweds were publicly murdered. Where is she getting that this was a wedding? I never ever read it that way (and you know I've thought about this story a lot, it's my "second-worst bible story").

Here are the parts that lend evidence to the idea that this was a wedding:

  1. Verse 6- "brought a Midianite woman to his kinfolk." This is very different from the NIV translation which just says "brought into the camp." I checked this website which has a bunch of different bible translations, and many of them include something along the lines of "to his relatives"/"to his brethren". It's like we might say "bringing a girl home to meet your family." In our culture that's a big relationship milestone. It means you're in a long-term, committed relationship, and likely to get married. And in ancient times, they had the idea of the woman leaving her family and "marrying into" her husband's family. So I suppose it does make sense that this would mean they are getting married.
  2. Verse 8 mentions a "tent" or "tent-chamber." Gafney says, "instead of an Israelite wedding canopy, a chuppah, there is a foreign wedding tent, a qubbah" and "the foreign word occurs only this once in the Scriptures" and has "uncertain meaning."
So, was this a wedding?

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How I always read the story

Here's how I always read this story:

The Israelites were passing through land where other nations lived, and those sneaky foreign women came and started to seduce the easily-distracted Israelite men. Like, come on guys, focus, why can't you just do what God says? It's not that hard! They were having casual sex (gross! God says sex is only supposed to be in marriage) and starting to worship those foreign gods. This is really bad! God ordered those involved to be executed. Kinda sad for them, but they're gross and sexual and God says they deserve to die, so that's that.

Anyway, when the Israelite leaders are openly weeping because of how bad the people's sin is, some Israelite guy literally comes in right then with some slut he picked up. He walks her right past the front of the camp, to his tent where they are gonna have sex. Come on dude, read the room! What's wrong with this guy? He seriously can't keep it in his pants, even after God has spoken and said this is such a serious sin that people need to be executed for it.

And then, finally, someone does something about it. Finally, someone loves God enough to take action and stop this horrible disobedience against God. Phinehas the priest followed them into the tent where they were having dirty dirty sex and stabbed his spear right through the both of them, and killed them. Wow, that's graphic and violent, but it was the right thing to do. Phinehas is the only one in this story who actually takes sin seriously, like we're supposed to. Wish we could be as courageous and faithful to God as Phinehas.

I read this story, back then, as a good evangelical girl, and it seemed to be about 2 things: casual sex, and worshipping other gods, both of which I knew were obviously bad, and which I couldn't relate to at all. People who committed such sins were one-dimensional caricatures, mustache-twirling villains who were ungrateful to God. Maybe it's a bit extreme to say they deserve to die for that, but, sin is sin, so I felt that God was within his rights to say they deserved to die. Plus, I knew I wasn't going to commit those sins, so it doesn't affect me. (Apologetics seared my conscience with a hot iron.)

Gafney reads this as a wedding, though. And the "worshipping other gods" bit she reads as hospitality from the foreign women, inviting the Israelites to their religious feasts. More on that later.

Rather than being about "hookup culture" with those slutty slutty foreign women, she reads this passage as being about relationships of all kinds. (Another cool thing is the book says this passage is "queer" because it talks about the foreign women having relationships with Israelite men and women.) Living in the same area, getting to know each other. Some even falling in love and getting married.

So Phinehas sprang into action and murdered Cozbi and Zimri because they were an international couple, not because of their dirty dirty casual sex.

That's ... that's horrifying, and my first thought was that if I had read it that way, back when I was a good evangelical teenager, I would have been horrified.

But...

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If it's about casual sex, or if it's about interracial marriage, how different is that, really?

I looked up some other translations and bible commentaries, to see if Christian scholars read this passage like I had always read it, or if they read it as a wedding, like Gafney does. Yeah, I found many of them using words like "blatant" and "parading"... those are words you would use for casual sex, right? Some guy just can't keep it in his pants, and he wants all the random passersby to know about it, eww.

But wait... in the bible, God forbids the Israelites from marrying people of other nations. Some guy falls in love with a foreign woman, and wants to let the world see his love, wants to marry her... Wouldn't that have been seen as disgusting, in their culture? Wouldn't that have been seen as "blatantly" "parading" his sin in front of everyone? Wouldn't it be seen as something you shouldn't do in polite society?

What we're circling around here is, this is about interracial marriage. Not *exactly* interracial marriage, because they didn't conceptualize race the same way we do today, but if you think about the history of interracial marriage in US society, well, it's the same as what we see in Numbers 25. Black men were lynched for the "crime" of dating a white woman. In "Womanist Midrash," Gafney says Zimri would have been seen as a "race traitor." She says this is a lynching. (She's right.)

"But," you may say, "surely not. Surely if they were just a nice couple, in love, getting married, who happened to be from different nations, the Israelite leaders wouldn't have been so upset about it. Surely people wouldn't have made such a big deal about it, even going so far to say it was good when they were killed. Surely not. Surely it must have been about some worse sin, like casual sex."

Did you, uh, totally miss all the culture wars over same-sex marriage, or what? 

Making a big deal about how someone else's marriage which does not affect you is such a horrible sin and they are "blatantly" "parading" it in front of us just by existing... that's pretty much evangelicals' whole schtick.

When I was a good little evangelical teenager, and read this passage... see, here's another horrifying thing. Imagine I had read, in the bible, that this was about a couple being murdered on their wedding day, for the crime of being from different nations and/or religions. ("Womanist Midrash" discusses this passage like that's obviously what it's saying, but I'm not convinced. But imagine if it was more obvious in the biblical text that that's what happened.) What would I have thought?

Good little evangelical Perfect Number would have thought it was sad, but it must have been right for Phinehas to kill them, because the bible says God approved of what Phinehas did, and the bible is always right.

No, not even newlyweds being murdered would have shaken me from my belief in biblical inerrancy. I was a good evangelical. I was an apologetics nerd.

And unfortunately, I have evidence to back that up: Good little evangelical Perfect Number read the book of Ezra, back then. In Ezra 9 and 10, the prophet Ezra finds out that many Israelite men had married foreign women, and he makes a huge big deal about it, sitting around weeping because of other people's families, other people's love, other people's mixed-race children. Then the leaders come together and decide they need to right this wrong; they need to send away these foreign women and mixed children. So that's what they do. Mass divorce and abandonment of their children.

And I read that back then and thought "well, yeah, God clearly told them not to intermarry with the other nations, so, that's what they had to do." I couldn't view it any other way; I couldn't say "wait a minute, this is wrong!" I was a good evangelical.

Years later, I read the Slacktivist's posts on this mass divorce in the book of Ezra. (Links here.) Blew my mind. Why is no one else talking about how the prophet Ezra was a racist bigot who tore families apart? Why is the Slacktivist the only one?

(See also: my Ezra fanfic Love Wins, and related post This "Do Not Intermarry With Them" Stuff Hits Different Now)

So yeah, you may naively assume that if good evangelicals read this story in Numbers 25 as being about international marriage and a murder at a wedding, rather than about casual sex, they would be more horrified and ready to throw away their belief in biblical inerrancy, but, no. Unfortunately, no.

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Hospitality

"Womanist Midrash" talks about the hospitality of the Moabite women. This was very surprising to me- "hospitality" is such a positive word, and I had always read the Moabite women's invitations to their religious feasts as a conniving evil scheme. "Mwahahaha, let's entice those people away from their god, and snare them in our evil religious rituals, worshipping our evil gods, mwahahaha."

But the way "Womanist Midrash" describes it, it was like this: The Israelites lived in the same area as the Moabites, and so naturally they began to interact with each other, and get to know each other, and develop close relationships. (Some of them even married each other.) And it was very kind and hospitable for the Moabite women to invite the Israelites to the Moabite religious festivals. Maybe from the Israelites' perspective, the Moabite religious practices weren't that different from their own, so they didn't view it as a big huge "we're abandoning our god" thing.

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Consensual marriage vs slavery

In the bible, God commands the Israelites to not marry foreign people. But, the Israelites are allowed to marry foreign captive women taken in war (see Deuteronomy 21:10-14). (And Gafney calls this "rape marriage" because honestly this isn't a romantic vision of how love can bloom in the most unlikely of places- no, it's "she's your slave and you can do whatever you want to her" and the bible uses the word "marriage" to describe that.)

So the issue here, the reason Zimri and Cozbi were judged as bad bad sinners whose murder was justified, was because their marriage was consensual. Because they chose each other. If an Israelite man takes a captive woman and enslaves her, makes her give up her culture, rapes her, and calls it "marriage", that is apparently fine. "Do not intermarry with them" just meant you can't have a consensual marriage.

It's horrifying, but at the same time, I can imagine myself as an evangelical, understanding the logic of this. Back then, of course I believed that we must not marry people from other religions, because there would be conflict as a result of each spouse's different beliefs, and the good Christian spouse wouldn't be able to win every single time, and would be influenced away from their correct Christian beliefs. But, isn't that only a problem if you go into marriage with the expectation that you are equals? What if you weren't equals? What if from the very start, the person with the correct religious beliefs dominated, and forced the other to give up their own religion and culture?

That would avoid all those "being influenced by those bad religions" problems, right?

I always heard Christians talk about mixed-faith marriage with this metaphor: The Christian is standing on a chair, and the non-Christian is standing on the ground, and the Christian is trying to pull the non-Christian spouse up, but isn't it so much easier for the non-Christian to pull them down? And that's why it's a bad idea to marry a non-Christian- you think you're going to influence them positively, but in reality, the more likely outcome is they're going to influence you negatively.

What on earth? Christians conceptualizing themselves as higher than everyone else, more moral than everyone else. Like there's nothing we can learn from each other; the Christian is already right about everything, and their non-Christian partner can only sabotage that. What on earth?

You can see how, if you're coming at it from that perspective, maybe it sort of makes sense than "rape marriage" is less bad than consensual mixed-faith marriage.

(Please note, I am a Christian and my husband is not- and I'm glad he's not a Christian.)

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Did Moses divorce Zipporah?

Cozbi is a Midianite, and after she is killed, Moses leads the Israelites in battle against the Midianites, to avenge... [checks notes] the way the Moabite women were hospitable to the Israelites?

Gafney points out that Moses's wife Zipporah is a Midianite. Or, rather, she says that Zipporah was Moses's wife, and then Moses divorced her (Exodus 18:2) and married another woman. The other woman is apparently mentioned in Numbers 12:1, "he had married a Cushite." I don't totally buy Gafney's interpretation here- I always thought it meant that Zipporah was both a Midianite and a Cushite, and Numbers 12:1 was referring to her. I certainly never was aware of the idea that Moses had divorced Zipporah. 

But, at the same time, the bible definitely says that Zipporah and her family are Midianites. (See Exodus 2.) And in Numbers 31, the Israelites go to battle against the Midianites, take the women and children as captives, and Moses is very angry that they allowed the Midianite women to live. He commands that they kill all non-virgin Midianite women, and all the Midianite boys, and "save for yourselves every girl who has never slept with a man." (Which turns out to be exactly as creepy as it sounds, my god.)

So, uh, what? Isn't Moses's wife a Midianite? Isn't Moses's wife a non-virgin Midianite woman? (Gafney points out that apparently Moses is unhappy with Midianite women monogamously having sex with their own husbands, what on EARTH.) Aren't Moses's in-laws all Midianites? Whether or not you believe that Moses divorced Zipporah, you still have the big problem of how it could possibly make sense that Moses is so bent out of shape by the Israelites intermarrying with Midian, when he himself did that.

"Womanist Midrash" points out that the bible is inconsistent on the issue of marrying foreigners. There are passages like this one, about how it was such a bad thing that Israelites married Moabite and Midianite women, and then there are plenty of bible heroes who married foreign women and the bible is apparently fine with that. Judah, Joseph, Moses, etc.

And one more thing: Moses commands that the Israelites kill all the boys among the Midianite captives. "Womanist Midrash" draws a connection between this passage and Moses's own escape from being killed as a baby, when the Pharaoh commanded that all the Israelite baby boys should be killed, and Moses's mother hid him and then eventually laid him in a basket in the river where he was rescued by Pharaoh's daughter. This is a beloved bible story; all the kids in Sunday school know about baby Moses in the basket. (Exodus 2:1-10)

Moses, who escaped the "kill all the baby boys" decree, is now saying "kill all the baby boys."

Why do we not talk about this in church?

When Moses's mother saves her baby and puts him in a basket, that's a wonderful tale of courage and heroism which we teach to our children. When Moses commands the Midianite boys to be executed, that's a footnote in an apologetics book, only mentioned in the context of "how do we respond to atheists who say the bible condones violence?" Oh, they had to kill the Midianite boys because [reasons], so, it's fine, move along, nothing to see here.

But these are the same story, Moses's story. When we tell one part without the other, we're spinning the story in a misleading way. We're not being faithful to the bible.

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Reading the Pentateuch (with a "biblical inerrancy" mindset) is an exercise in maintaining hierarchy

All of this is bringing me back to when I was a good evangelical teenager, working on reading through the whole bible. As I read through the laws that God gave Moses, my thoughts were as follows:

bible: "don't do xyz"

me: "well, yeah, xyz is a sin, they shouldn't do it"

bible: "if anyone does xyz, they must be put to death"

me: "well, maybe that feels a bit harsh, but, really, I'm wrong to feel that way- this is a sin and therefore it *does* deserve to be punished with the death penalty. So, that's fine, keep reading."

Looking back on it now, I feel that the way I read the bible back then was all about brutally maintaining rules and hierarchy. The bible says that people who do this or that bad thing are so bad they deserve to die, and I had to make myself believe it. Make myself believe that was a just law, and that those people were so different from me, I would never do something like that, so I'm safe.

It's very much the opposite of a "black lives matter" mindset. I've seen plenty of hot takes on the internet, white people making arguments about how a black victim of police brutality deserved to die because they weren't perfectly polite, or might have committed some minor nonviolent crime, or used to do drugs, and I think of the way I forced myself to believe it was right when God commanded a man should be executed for gathering sticks on the Sabbath.

Gafney is coming from a very different perspective, focusing on the victims of these laws, those who were oppressed and excluded and punished by the laws given by God and/or Moses.

I wonder if the "inerrant" reading of the bible (ie, you have to believe that all the laws given by God are good) is less of an option for marginalized people who have seen how our society's laws are used as a justification for violence against them and "keeping them in their place."

Thinking about myself, when I was a teenager, reading the last few chapters of Deuteronomy. After Moses finishes giving all the laws to the people, there are a few chapters about the blessings they will receive if they obey, and curses if they disobey. I remember thinking that this section of the bible was kind of repetitive, just hammering on the same points over and over- I felt like "yeah we get it, we should obey God, obviously, this is not that complicated, you don't need to keep saying it over and over."

Just follow these rules. Just repress yourself. Just exclude the people God wants you to exclude. It's not that complicated, why don't people get it?

For Cozbi and Zimri, it wasn't that they were irresponsible and rebellious and easily distracted from God's commands and God's blessings. No. It was because they found love, and they knew it was so much better than the narrow-minded laws that Moses was trying to use to keep everybody in line. Discovering how good it is to connect with other people, to value people, to share with each other and learn from each other and accept each other.

There's a whole world out there. Love the world. 

And I'm aware that what I'm saying here- about the law of Moses being used to exclude and punish- is also argued in the bible. In the New Testament, Paul says, "The letter kills, but the Spirit gives life." He says that the law can only tell you what you did wrong- it can't save you- and that's why we need Jesus. 

But, did we really need to wait for Jesus for that? Didn't Cozbi and Zimri already know that love was better than exclusion, and they were killed for it?

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Conclusion

So. Those are my thoughts on the story of Cozbi and Zimri, which I still maintain is The Second-Worst Bible Story. I was very surprised that Wilda Gafney reads it as a wedding, rather than a story about how bad and wrong it is to have casual sex. I'm fascinated by this interpretation. My own marriage is international, interracial, interreligious. And Christians need to talk about the parts of the bible where the bible "heroes" and/or God do something wrong. The bible is not always right, and we need to talk about that.

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Posts about the book "Womanist Midrash" by Wilda C. Gafney:

Womanist Midrash 
The Slavery We Ignore in the Book of Exodus 
The Second-Worst Bible Story

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Follow-up post: Don't Protect God

Related:

This "Do Not Intermarry With Them" Stuff Hits Different Now 

Everyone Else's Nadab and Abihu Fanfics

The Worst Bible Story

Thursday, September 5, 2024

Blogaround

1. The Convention That Ate Republicans’ Lunch (August 26) "Democrats were able to take these themes (and several others) away from Republicans because the GOP has spent years giving them little more than lip service. When Ron DeSantis began banning books and threatening teachers who taught inconvenient facts about American history, those actions raised no debate about freedom within the Republican Party. There has been no controversy about nominating a philandering, twice-divorced, pussy grabber to lead the party of family values. When one jury of ordinary Americans found Trump responsible for sexual assault, another ruled beyond a reasonable doubt that he had committed fraud, and he avoided his other felony indictments through delaying tactics rather than by challenging the evidence against him, members of the law-and-order party attacked the justice system rather than question their allegiance to a criminal."

2. Sending Unarmed Responders Instead of Police: What We’ve Learned (July 25, via) "In Washington, D.C., social service nonprofit Bread for the City has sued the city, claiming that sending police to mental health emergencies discriminates against people with mental health disabilities."

3. Black Myth: Wukong - Headless Guy Singing Scene (August 20) My husband and son, who are Chinese, won't stop singing this song.

4. Federal Judge Tells Undocumented Spouses Of US Citizens To GTFO (August 27) "But what about protecting the rule of law and stopping an invasion of people who have lived here without incident for over a decade, huh?"

5. Army says Arlington National Cemetery worker was 'pushed aside' by Trump aides (August 29)

Steve Shives's take is also good: Trump at Arlington: Because Rules (and Respect) Are for Other People (August 30) "Every time you think that this guy couldn't possibly be more insensitive and more disrespectful and more tacky than you've already seen him be, he somehow manages to top himself."

6. Small-town firefighters sawed through the Arizona border wall to rescue an injured man who waited 24 hours for help (August 30) "Tangye Beckham, fire chief of the Arivaca Fire District, said that after hours of delays in the remote area and no alternative method for giving the man the care he needed, she ordered the border wall to be cut so he could be pulled through and taken for medical care on the U.S. side."

7. NaNoWriMo Organizers Said It Was Classist and Ableist to Condemn AI. All Hell Broke Loose (September 4) 

Tuesday, September 3, 2024

"The Storm That Stopped" (kids' book review)

Book cover for "The Storm That Stopped."

I bought this book for my son: The Storm That Stopped [affiliate link], by Alison Mitchell. This book is from the "Tales That Tell the Truth" series, like "Jesus and the Lions' Den" which I also reviewed. The idea behind this series is taking bible stories which are not necessarily about Jesus and using them to teach a point about who Jesus is.

This book, "The Storm That Stopped," is an adaptation of Mark 4:35-41, when Jesus calms the storm. So this one actually is about Jesus. But it does more than just tell the story; at the end of the book, the last 5 pages tell us that the reason Jesus performed this miracle was to show the disciples who he is. Only God can calm a storm... and Jesus calmed a storm... therefore Jesus is God! So it's not just the bible story; it's the story plus an abstract point about who Jesus is.

This book is really good! If you follow my blog, you know I have a lot to say about how most bible stories have elements which are weird and problematic- but I don't think the story of Jesus calming the storm is problematic, so that's why this book rates so highly for me. I don't have a bunch of hot takes saying we shouldn't teach this story to children. No, this story is fine. So I think it works very well as a children's book.

There was one part I found extremely objectionable, though. So, Jesus and the disciples are on a boat in the middle of a lake, and there's a huge storm, and the disciples were terrified, but Jesus was sleeping. And here's what the book says:

The wind blew harder. The waves grew huger. The water filled the boat. But Jesus was still asleep.

"Jesus!"

"Wake up! Wake up!"

"We're drowning!"

"Don't you care?"

What a silly thing to say to Jesus! Of course he cared. He loved his friends so much that one day he was going to die for them.

I know this is my ex-evangelical trauma talking, but, this is beyond the pale. Policing people's emotions? Really? Someone's in a terrifying situation, and you shame them for having very reasonable feelings about it? Like they're wrong for observing that it seems like Jesus doesn't care what's happening. Like they should just "trust God" and not have feelings.

Evangelicalism is full of this kind of policing of emotions. God didn't answer your prayers because you didn't have the right kind of faith. Because you didn't have the right motives. God let bad things happen to you in order to teach you something, and if you didn't "trust God" in the middle of the situation, that's a sin. And if you come out of it angry at God, that's a sin. And if you do the right thing for the wrong reasons, that's a sin. And if something good happens, but you don't give credit to God, that's a sin, and God will probably sabotage your life to teach you a lesson. And if something makes you happy, better be careful that you don't end up loving it more than God, or else God will take it away. And if you really want something, then you're being selfish. And if someone hurts you, you have to forgive them right away; if you continue to be unhappy about it- if it causes you long-term trauma- then you're "bitter" and that's a sin too.

In evangelical ideology, it's a sin to have normal human emotions. People who quit being evangelical have to go through the whole process of learning how to feel their own feelings and know what they want. Because they were never allowed to have feelings (besides the feelings that God would want them to have) or want things.

So when I read this kids' book, and the disciples were scared and asked Jesus, "Don't you care?" and the book says that was "silly", I just... wow, this is not okay. I really do have trauma about this.

When I read this page to my son, I always stop and say that actually, it was totally fine for them to be scared and think that Jesus didn't care. So, as far as the impact on my son is concerned, I do think that fixes the problem. It's extremely harmful that the book says the disciples were being "silly" when they thought Jesus didn't care about them, but since it's just mentioned once and doesn't impact the rest of the story, it's an easy fix. I just tell my son that this part of the book is wrong, and it's totally normal for someone to feel like Jesus doesn't care, if they're in that situation. (And I think it's good for him to learn that just because something is in a book doesn't mean it's right.)

So overall, the book is good, but you DEFINITELY need to address that nonsense when you get to that page.

And let's talk about the part at the end, where the book says that the reason Jesus performed this miracle was to show the disciples that He is God. The last page says "Jesus is... GOD!" and I'm a Christian so I'm like "yeah!" but sometimes I also tell my son "yeah some people believe Jesus is God, but you don't have to." Honestly, I think this part of the book is too abstract for him and he doesn't get it. He's in preschool. He's more interested in the tangible parts of the story that he understands- boats, water, sleeping, etc.

In conclusion, this book has my ex-evangelical Christian stamp of approval- assuming, of course, that you stop and tell your kid it's okay for the disciples to be scared.

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Related:

"Jesus and the Lions' Den" (kids' book review)

"Who Is My Neighbor?" (Kids' Book Review) 

Not Sure I Want My Kid Reading the Bible

Saturday, August 31, 2024

Maybe Jesus Was A Pharisee

Jesus talking to Pharisees. Image source.

A few posts from Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg which are worth reading (via):

Jesus and the Jews: Part One
Jesus and Beit Hillel (Part 2!) 
Wrapping up Jesus

These posts explore the possibility that maybe Jesus was a Pharisee, who followed the ideas of Hillel, and when the bible talks about Jesus having disagreements with "the Pharisees" (which happens A LOT), it's about his disagreements with other Pharisees who followed the ideas of Shammai.

Let me give some background here about what I was taught about the Pharisees, when I was evangelical: The Pharisees were religious leaders who were really into following the exact rules, and they totally missed the point of why God gave us the rules. They totally missed that God wants us to love and care about people. Instead, they would make more and more rules, and work very hard to follow them, just to be sure that they were obeying God correctly. 

In the modern evangelical church, if you call someone a Pharisee, it means they are being more strict about religious rules than you think they should be. For example, when I was growing up, girls were taught that we needed to be "modest", ie, we needed to wear clothes that boys would never interpret as sexy. (LOL have you met teenage boys?) My church taught this, but also looked disapprovingly on other conservative Christians who also taught modesty but added more specifics than we did. Those other, more fundamentalist Christians were measuring the exact length of girls' skirts, to make sure they met the "modesty" standards. We said that was "legalistic" and "like the Pharisees." We believed modesty was supposed to be more vibes-based, and shouldn't include extremely specific rules like that.

Looking back on it now, it's so ridiculous how each specific brand of conservative Christianity draws a line in some certain place to define the rules that Christians are supposed to live by, and declares that anyone who draws the line in a more permissive spot is rejecting God's law, while anyone who draws the line to be more strict is being too legalistic, like the Pharisees. We were like, "lol can you believe these senseless rules that these extreme fundamentalist Christians follow? They are completely different from the rules we follow, which are the correct rules given by the bible." Were they though?

When I was in the process of leaving evangelicalism, and I read a lot of ex-evangelical blogs, that's when I first heard that there's A LOT of anti-Semitism baked into evangelical Christianity. I had no idea before. A lot of very normal things you hear in church are anti-Semitic. Honestly, ex-evangelicals should be doing the work to unlearn that anti-Semitism- especially those of us who continue to be Christians. (Basically we believed something along the lines of "Jewish people were wrong about what their own scriptures meant [and Jews today continue to be wrong about that] and then Jesus came along and set them straight.") And the evangelical view of the Pharisees is one of the big examples of this anti-Semitism.

Evangelicals use the term "Pharisee" as a shorthand for "someone who is so fixated on rules that they miss the whole point." And the bible does portray them this way- honestly I would say the bible does portray them as this one-dimensional caricature, which is really not fair to them. The Pharisees were an actual serious group within Judaism back then. Jesus criticized them sometimes, but that doesn't mean their ideas were all bad. It *is* anti-Semitic for Christians to insult other Christians by saying "you're being like the Pharisees." (I've seen ex-evangelicals questioning the rules we were taught, and coming to the realization "oh my goodness, it was us evangelicals who were being like the Pharisees all along!" It's a good sentiment, but please leave the Pharisees out of it! See what I mean about how ex-evangelicals need to unlearn this anti-Semitism?)

And I'm aware that I titled this post "Maybe Jesus Was A Pharisee" and from an evangelical perspective, them's fightin' words. Like I'm saying "maybe Jesus was a heartless jerk who cared more about rules than people." Using "Pharisee" as a slur. No, I'm not saying that- what I mean (and what Rabbi Ruttenberg is saying) is, maybe Jesus was a member of this specific group of Jewish scholars who spent time discussing the nature of God and how we should live.

(Probably it's not just evangelicals who view Pharisees in this way. Probably there are other Christian groups which do too.)

Anyway, that's the background I wanted to give before discussing Rabbi Ruttenberg's blog posts. She presents the idea that maybe Jesus was a Pharisee, and the bible records the intracommunity debates that he had with other Pharisees. It's a good blog series, you should read it if you're really into the bible. It's especially good to get this historical background, from a Jewish perspective- this isn't something I had ever heard from Christians before.

I want to quote a few parts here which really stood out to me. There's this:

The Pharisees had Jesus’ back!

At that very hour some Pharisees came, and said to him, “Get away from here, for Herod wants to kill you.” (Luke 13:31)

I read that and I was like, oh wow. Ruttenberg reads this as the Pharisees trying to protect Jesus- wow, I totally never read it that way. I always read that verse as "some Pharisees, who were always criticizing Jesus and trying to tell him what to do, came and said 'get away from here, for Herod wants to kill you,' ugh how annoying, what is these guys' problem?" Ruttenberg says "The Pharisees had Jesus' back" and I'm like, oh wow, I totally never ever thought that when I read that verse.

But her reading is very reasonable, right? If you read this in a totally different context, like "[somebody] came and said to [somebody else], 'Get away from here, for [somebody] wants to kill you,'" probably you would read it as them being concerned and trying to be helpful by warning him. 

It's just because it's Jesus and the Pharisees, and as evangelicals we always viewed the Pharisees in this way- that's why I always read this passage as an example of how the Pharisees were always causing trouble for Jesus and not believing in him like they were supposed to. It's mind-blowing to me to realize, just now, that that's not what this bible verse says at all. 

Another example from Rabbi Ruttenberg's posts is about handwashing. She discusses how the followers of Hillel and the followers of Shammai had debates about the correct order of operations when mixing wine- do you wash your hands before or after? Going through and nitpicking the logic of whether or not the water residue on the cup makes your hands unclean, etc. And then she presents this passage about Jesus:

When Jesus had finished speaking, a Pharisee invited him to eat with him; so he went in and reclined at the table. But the Pharisee was surprised when he noticed that Jesus did not first wash before the meal. Then the Lord said to him, “Now then, you Pharisees clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside you are full of greed and wickedness. You foolish people! Did not the one who made the outside make the inside also? (Luke 11:37-40

A lil' bonus antisemitism thrown in for funsies, but you see that Jesus either doesn't wash, or doesn't wash first, and Jesus snarks at our Pharisee friend for worrying about external cooties. He very well could be harshing on the Beit Shammai position.

Wow! Okay, this is FASCINATING! The hand-washing thing was a real debate among the Pharisees back then. Maybe Jesus had experience thinking through the logic of how one should wash one's hands, and participating in debates about it, and that's where he's coming from here. I always read this passage completely differently, like he's an outsider looking at the Pharisees and mocking them for being so silly.

Is it a very simplistic and shallow "haha look at those weirdos over there"? Or is it "I know what they're talking about. I know it too well, because I am one of them"?

Is it like... like some conspiracy theory that I have never had any interest in, like "flat earth" for example? You tell me some people believe the earth is flat, and I'll be like "lollll do they not use GPS, or?" My feeling is that it's so obvious that it's wrong- I just mock them with a one-liner and move on, with no interest in actually understanding their thinking. That's how I always read Jesus' interactions with the Pharisees in the bible. Like they were just stereotypes who were so obviously wrong.

Or is it more like, say, my experiences with believing in biblical inerrancy? Yes, I used to be evangelical, I used to believe the bible is inerrant, and all the layers of logic and reasoning that go along with that belief. Occasionally an atheist would come along and say something like "the bible is full of contradictions!" or "the bible says pi is equal to 3, lololol" and none of that affected me because those are extremely shallow criticisms from people who don't know anything about what it actually means to believe the bible is inerrant.

But I know how it really is. How in the bible, God commands genocide, and if you truly believe in inerrancy, and you get really into apologetics, you have to become the kind of person who believes genocide is right sometimes. I know how that is; I've been there. And I know how it is when you finally have permission to believe "these bible stories didn't really happen" or "they believed that God commanded this, but they were wrong," and the joy and freedom you feel when you don't have to be that kind of person any more. (Thank you, Peter Enns.)

I know how it is, and when I criticize the idea of inerrancy, or even joke about it, it's not just some shallow drive-by mockery. I understand what it's like to think that way.

Was that how Jesus was, with the Pharisees? Ruttenberg makes the case that Jesus may have been a Pharisee from the school of Hillel, and he argued with the Pharisees who followed Shammai. Both groups would have known the ins and outs of each other's arguments, and understood and respected each other, even though they strongly disagreed on some things. When you view it this way, it puts those bible passages about Jesus and the Pharisees in a totally different light.

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Related:

My mind is blown by how cool the Synoptic Problem is 

No One Can Take The Bible From Me

Wednesday, August 28, 2024

Blogaround

1. From xkcd we have Storage Tanks and Classical Periodic Table, lollllllll

2. In Black Myth: Wukong, China Sees a Game That Could Change Everything (August 21)

3. Trump promotes family’s new crypto platform, ‘The Defiant Ones’ (August 22) Well this sounds like a scam.

4. JD Vance Jizz Cups & the Death of Fact Checking (August 22) "I expected technology to change, for fakes to get harder to detect but also for bullshit detection tools to get better, but I didn’t anticipate what actually seems to have happened: fakes are now harder to detect and the bullshit detection tools have simply disappeared."

Don't believe everything you see on social media! And, related to that, I often see people on social media talking about "Republicans are saying [some weird thing]" and people make jokes to mock the supposed Republicans who are saying this, and it keeps going and takes on a life of its own- but, uh, were there really Republicans saying that in the first place? Maybe it was just 1 weirdo on the internet, not a widespread idea shared by most Republicans. Be careful about believing things like that without fact-checking.

At the same time, though, voting for Trump *is* a widespread Republican thing, and that's shocking and extremist and deserving of mockery.

5. Answers in Genesis’ Misleading Claims (Lies) About Mammals and Dinosaurs (August 8) "In each case, they’re taking fossils of extinct animals that share some superficial similarities with modern creatures and presenting them as if they were identical to today’s species. This is not just a misunderstanding – it’s a misrepresentation of scientific findings."

6. DHS watchdog warns of 'urgent issue' after immigration officials allegedly lose track of unaccompanied children (August 20) "He urged ICE to 'take immediate action to ensure the safety of [unaccompanied children] residing in the United States.'"

7. Are You Caught in the FOG(C) of Coercive Control? (August 23) "The partner who is being controlled frequently becomes adept at rationalizing and justifying the harmful behaviour because they understand, often unconsciously, what it takes to minimize the risk of their partner lashing out at them."

8. World-first lung cancer vaccine trials launched across seven countries (August 23, via) This is great!

9. ‘Exactly where you don’t want to look’ (August 26) "I shouldn’t know who Kate Cox is. I absolutely should not know the most intimate details of her family, her personal life, and the health of her uterus. But I do. We all do. We all know all about all of that because the state government of Texas insisted on making her personal life and health a very public matter of state policy, state decision-making, and state interference." 

Monday, August 26, 2024

Raising Mixed Race (a book for parents of mixed-race Asian kids)

Book cover for "Raising Mixed Race."

I read the book Raising Mixed Race: Multiracial Asian Children in a Post-Racial World [affiliate link], by Sharon H. Chang. I read this because my 2 kids are mixed-race Asian kids (white/Chinese). I really liked this book. It had a lot of deep stuff to say. I recommend this to parents of mixed-race Asian kids.

This post will cover some of my thoughts about the book:

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Language

The book spends a lot of time in the beginning talking about the language used to discuss race. The language we commonly use has origins in racist ideologies throughout history- for example, in the 1700s, Europeans invented the "five-race construct" (ie, the five races are Caucasian, Mongolian, Malayan, Ethiopian, American). Even now, you sometimes see the term "Mongolian" used to refer to something related to east Asians. That's kinda racist.

The example given in the book is a nurse discussing Chang's son's "Mongolian spots." A Mongolian spot is a dark birthmark, kind of looks like a bruise, that some east Asian children have. The nurse, aware that the name sounded kinda racist, said, "I don't know why they call it that, they just do." Chang was unhappy about this; in the book she says this nurse was perpetuating this racism by using the term "Mongolian spots."

I don't really know what to think about this- my first reaction is that it seems fine to me to use the term "Mongolian spots" but to say it with air quotes or something that makes it obvious you're aware it sounds kinda racist. The book seems to be saying that even using it at all is racist and bad. What's the alternative, though? Does she want this nurse to start a movement to call it something different, right then and there? (A quick google tells me that "Mongolian spots" do have a non-racist name: slate gray nevus. Okay, so, now that we know, we should use that term instead.) My second reaction was, I'm white so maybe I shouldn't tell people of color "oh this thing you think is racist, actually it's not racist."

A lot of this book was about how it's problematic for people to say certain things about mixed-race Asian kids. And I definitely agree that the language we use for race has a really bad history, and it's important to learn about that history, and in an ideal world we wouldn't use that language, but I'm not sure what to do in the world we actually have. It doesn't seem helpful to me to create a really long list of things you're not allowed to say when talking about race (which is sort of what I felt the book was doing, in some places).

For example, the book says you shouldn't talk about what specific fraction people are of each race (ie, my kids are half Chinese and half white). Instead, the book always uses the term "mixed race" or lists the specific ethnic groups (for example, "Chinese/white"). Yes, this makes sense to me, because historically there have been government policies that quantified what fraction your ancestry would need to be to "count" as a certain race (like the "one-drop rule"), and those policies have always been harmful. And even now, if a mixed-race person ever meets someone who really wants to know the specific fractions of their ancestry (ie, it's really important to this random stranger to find out that you're 1/2 white, 1/4 Chinese, and 1/4 Vietnamese), that can really only come from racist assumptions. This person is trying to figure out what stereotypes to apply to you, and that's why they want to know the numbers. Or they're trying to say that you're not "really" Chinese (it could be other Chinese people telling a mixed-race Chinese person that).

So yeah, I agree that it's problematic to talk about mixed-race people in terms of specific fractions. And it's problematic to discuss which of their physical features look like which race. And it's problematic to say that one sibling looks "more white" than the other sibling. Etc. I feel like this book spends a lot of time telling us things we shouldn't say.

Is that useful? I guess? But if people still have the same framework for thinking about race, but they just know they're not allowed to say their conclusions out loud, does that actually help? I guess then maybe the next generation will grow up not hearing people say those problematic things, so they won't internalize the ideology that goes with it.

Anyway, I agree that we should be aware of the language we use, and the history of it. Chang does a very good job of explaining the history of these racist ideas and why it's problematic when people use certain terminology to discuss race or mixed-race people. But in a practical sense, I sometimes felt like this book was telling me a lot of things we are not allowed to say. And I don't really know what I should say instead? I guess that's not a problem with the book, but with the racism embedded in our society.

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The history of laws surrounding interracial marriage

When I learned about the civil rights movement in school, I remember learning about laws which made it illegal for a white and black person to marry. And then the famous Supreme Court case, Loving vs Virginia, struck down all those laws. What I did NOT know was that this wasn't just about white/black interracial marriage- there were also laws saying white people couldn't marry Asian people. Wow! I had no idea! And I am a white American married to an Asian guy. Kind of ridiculous that I had never heard about this history at all.

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White dads who "don't see race"

This book had many examples of white dads being problematic toward their Asian wives and mixed-race kids. For example, there was a white man who was dating a Chinese woman, and wasn't willing to travel to China to meet her family, what on EARTH. There are white men who don't think it's important for their mixed-race Asian kids to learn about their Asian culture, eat the food, celebrate holidays, and so on.

It's common for white people in the US to not really be very aware of race. To assume that since it doesn't affect them, it won't affect their kids either. You look at your own kid, and all you think about is how you love your kid. Of course you don't see them as a simple Asian stereotype, and therefore it never occurs to you that other people will see them that way.

(Also my situation is different because I'm in China; I'm a minority here. This book is written from a US perspective. Obviously very different from what my son is experiencing as he grows up in China.)

I feel that this is something unique that mixed-race kids have to deal with. If you live in the US and have a white parent, that parent hasn't had the experience of people treating them as a racial stereotype, and so they don't know what their child is experiencing. If both parents are monoracial, well that's a different thing than being mixed-race, and so the parents aren't really able to relate to much of what the kids are experiencing.

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Kids know more about race than their parents expect

Many of the parents interviewed for this book (parents of all races) said they hadn't really talked to their kids about race because they felt like their kids were young enough that it didn't affect them yet. But, the book says, kids do have ideas about race, from a very young age. There are examples of babies who have an Asian mother, and the babies are happy to be held by other Asian women, even total strangers, but cry if someone of a different race holds them. There are examples of toddlers being afraid of black people.

I also haven't talked to my son about race very much. He is in preschool. (My daughter is still an infant. She hasn't even discovered her feet yet. I don't think she knows about race.) I guess I don't really know what I'm supposed to tell him.

My son goes to a public school here in China. All the other kids are (monoracial) Chinese. I wonder if he has thoughts on that. I just assumed that little kids didn't really have any awareness of it, but, uh, why did I assume that? And to me, my son looks Chinese (but I guess I'm not supposed to say that?) but then when I see him next to the other kids, who are Chinese and not mixed-race, well then you can really tell that he's mixed-race white. Sometimes when I pick him up from school, the other kids see me and point out that I'm not Chinese.

(And he always gets Chinese people commenting on how his skin is white, like it's a compliment, which I also find problematic. My FAVORITE one was when we were at a restaurant, and then after we finished eating, I left to go to the bathroom, and then the people at the next table started talking to my husband and son, and they were like "he looks like an international baby"... like... they did not realize he *actually is* an international baby. Apparently they totally missed me being there.)

I guess my son does have thoughts about race. But doesn't have the language to communicate them with me. 

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Practical suggestions

I'm glad I read this book because it had some practical ideas which I find useful. 

  • I should help my kids find friends who are mixed-race. If they grow up being the only one, they will feel like they're weird and different and no one understands them. I don't know why I didn't think of this before- *I* am in some social media groups for international women married to Chinese men, and that's really helpful for me- why didn't I realize that kind of thing would also be really helpful for my son?
  • Toys and books which depict mixed-race people and interracial marriage. The book talks about how it's really difficult to find stuff like this! It's hard to find a doll which is Asian, let alone mixed-race Asian. After reading "Raising Mixed Race," I got these books for my son: All About Families and All About Diversity [affiliate links]. To show him that there are all different kinds of families and people. These are really good! I guess I should also find a book for him with a main character who is mixed-race white/Asian.

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It's not just about white + east Asian people

Typically when people think about "mixed race Asian", they think about white + east Asian (ya know, like my kids). But this book makes sure to include a much greater range than that. It includes families from many different Asian countries (including India). And it talks a lot about anti-black racism in the US, and how that is connected to Asian people's experiences in the US, and there's a whole chapter about the unique situation that mixed-race black/Asian people are in.

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Conclusion

I liked this book, and I recommend it if you have kids who are mixed-race Asian. It helped me realize that I do need to think about how race affects my kids' lives, and how to talk to them about it.

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Related:

On Marriage as an Immigrant in China 

This "Do Not Intermarry With Them" Stuff Hits Different Now

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